The Quiet Lament

wat is the purpose of consistent percipitation from ones eyes and the solution tht binds the mind to care tht they r leaking. As the liquid falls down the face and the thoughts flow thru the mind wat really affects the body to do such a useless and irrelevant thing? Wat runs up and down ur head tht makes u want to console the causality of the bahavior?...ill tell u...'Choice'...
The choice that all people must make to change a life is always different yet still the same. all the intricate little peaces that come into the mixture make the choices non-understandable. once the chaser now the chased. i must now not look forward to the past, but back to the truth. W/ the pieces of my world falling apart today my tears shall be the glue to put them back together and move forward to a better tomorrow.

Immaculate Dream

I awake from my slumber to find myself in my usual place with the same dull ceiling. Glancing around my room the same usual items thrown in the same places, Time? 10am Usual hour of unrest that I find myself awakening to without my alarm. Schedule says work at 3pm. Time flies by, 2pm I’m out the door, walking alone as usual. Taking the ever unchanging path to work that I always do, something about today felt completely different. As I glance at the last corner before the plaza of my employment, I turn said corner… I’m no longer in Texas. For I am home…Ny…Brooklyn. What in the world? i turn to see how it’s possible, Texas is long gone. I walk forward. I find person A an to my amazement they’re excited to see me, as am I to them. Time? 3pm, strange. the day consisted on multiple places and events, I take ‘A’ home. Upon entry to ‘A’s’ place, arguments erupt like a volcano to ‘A’s” displeasure, we leave. Running through Brooklyn till we get a cab “To the Airport” I say. “Where are we going?” asked ‘A’. “Anywhere, lets close out eyes in front of the map and randomly walk up to an area.” I say, which ‘A’ replies a single solitary “Ok.” Plane ride was an unknown amount of time, for I awoke in a bungalow. Alone again, time? 10am. Hmm why am I not surprised by the time. Staring at the woven ceiling I hear someone in the distance to my first glance it’s not ‘A’…for it’s now ‘B’ an to my shock they smile. Breakfast served in bed, watched the horizon of people on the beach, relaxed. Then off we go to a day full of events, yet again, as I leave I check the time…2pm…this can surely only be a coincidence. We arrive at a lake, which is full of tropical people with a nice tropical setting. Beautiful, clear sky’s. A boat ride is to take place when I notice ‘B’s’ family present. Things seem ok. shortly they take a turn for the worse. upon my entry to the rinky-dink boat, I glance at ‘B’ to see her enraged and dive head first into the water and begin to swim away. Pulling money out of my pocket as fast as i can, I plead the boat driver to chase after ‘B’. ‘B’ swims to the other side to find her mother on the other side lounging in the sand, taking in the sun ‘B’ crouches down to speak with her, when the boats slides on land. “Hey, run away with me right now!” I say. ‘B’ turns smiling and dives in again. Before going after ‘B’ I glance at the mother to find not a disapproval, but a hearty smile, and an approving wave good-bye as she disappears. We finally stop in a town, laughing beyond belief. Going from store to store, sight to sight. The sun is slowly setting so we head towards the forest area to get some complete solitude. Passing through what appears to be a flooded (covered) outdoor sitting area, with ‘B’ right behind me walking by these four large ponds. The sun is low, fireflies in the distance, crickets in the background for natural effect. I turn to not find ‘B’ but someone else. Someone completely different yet again. This time the persons face isn’t clearly visible. The only Distinguishing feature that I can make out. Light honey colored skin, long curly brown hair (could be a different color due to lighting) but what the last cracks of the sun on the horizon defined to me the most. Her eyes, a bright, beautiful pair of green eyes…eyes that I’ve seen before…but from a very long, LONG time ago… An accent spikes as ‘C’ is bitten by a mosquito, soon after so was I. Peering into the water it hits me “this is a mosquito NEST!” I say. grabbing her hand we run till completely out of the area, laughing as we slowed. ‘Trip’ we both fall, rolling down a small hill, she lands on her back as i brace myself above her… Staring deeply into ‘C’s’ eyes…those piercing, bright, beautiful green eyes, both of us inching in for a kiss. It hit me that i knew who this person was. As I was to say the persons name, SNAP! Awoken from my actual sleep…as I feverishly glance around my surroundings I realize ‘tis not me dreaming anymore. For I am awake. And before I completely lost this amazing, vivid dream that i swore was real, I sit here telling you readers. Hope this made your day feel a lil nicer.

The deluded mind

Floating from a dream scape to nightmare All in a flash
All the twists and turns from pleasure to insanity
You pray for an escape but it never appears
Always wondering what the unknown has in store for you
You continue to search the darkness
Then your guiding light shines through
Almost 2am sitting in a hotel room vanquishing my thoughts
clearing my head
destroying my ears with the sweet sounds of bass
Silence
We already had this talk numerous times before
But why is my mind plagued this night?
Fear
What do I have to be so afraid of?
Taking deep breathes
And a sip of my water I type
crunch on a cookie watching the crumbs hit he ground
I stop my hands from shaking
Relax
It's all in your mind
There's nothing there
Stop overthinking
Overanalyzing this
Halt
Go no further
for my mind runs
My brain races
Sleep my mortal enemy.
I return to my bass, searching for the end of this
mortal attack of my senses
for only I can end this

Putting me back 2gether

U came into my life unexpectedly
N expected the world
I can be
But yes I have my own issues
U want to deal wit em
Thts amazing
Got me feelin
like I'm on cloud nine
I fall
Push u away
But I'm wrong
All I want is u
All I want is us
However long it takes
I'll change me to b wit u
Cuz ur worth it
Uhf worth my time
Ur worth my feelings
My real emotions
U r my heart
An my heart if urs

Ha ha

#random I want a pet cheetah

Chasing Amy Syndrome

Ever just go through a regular do with no expectations?
Of course you have
Ever wake up in the morning wondering what you're doing with your life?
More than likely
Walked down that usual street then see what you consider a beautiful woman
Definitely
Now you soak with this person
Get to know them and things seem magically right
Progression from talking to mingling
Mingling to dating
Dating to a full on relationship
Wonderful
Length of this relationship doesn't matter
Completely irrelevant
This wondrous woman doesn't seem so right for some reason
Things begun to crumble
Experience difference is immense
Building a bridge between you
You begin to push her away
Not coping with the alternate views
Breakage
Time passes
Longing for their attention becomes staggering
You miss her
Crave her
Desire her touch
Her perfect form in your arms
Sweet scent
Soft voice
Beautiful smile
Pleasant times together
You can't move on
You try to act real strong
Now you could say that you don't love her anymore
And you can say you've close the door on your love
And went your separate ways
But I would be the same cause love won't be the same
So you want her back cause your love is still on your brain
But won't get her back
So you're just chasing a ghost of your past

Mental Clarity

Ingesting my poison
inhaling my venom
my mind cannot seem to stop
always constantly moving
not knowing where to end
in order to obtain the finish
you must know where to begin
with completely unclear intentions
I begin this with the end
indecisiveness is a killer
blaring my music like sirens
i hear the shots of the bass
killing my ear drums
penetrating my consciousness
longing for the one thing that can intently cure me
not looking for for the solution for my problem
i hesitate
confusion sets in
seeing a series of events with an unsure conclusion
not understanding the outcome
i feel like running
desiring a finish to the madness
i'm speechless
ingesting my choices
not willing to choose from the masses
i want to escape
letting my thoughts flow
like a spring river thawing out
from impassable mountains
i stop
traversing my mind
where am i supposed to go?
running through this marathon of inventions
i patent not a single one to reality
so many outcomes
i've made a fool of myself
misdirecting myself
i sit back an reminisce on my life at this point
hurting myself
i press forward
wanting to fast forward past the bad parts
destruction
insomnia setting in
craving the release from myself
internally torturing myself
searching for a release from the madness
i put on my mask
covering my own concern
warping and distorting my own reality
hoping to discover something new in my chaos
but only uncovering my own estrange past
not intending to backtrack
unwillingly doing so
wheres my other half when needed?
invisible
new state new beginnings
same outcome, different events
returning to my poison consumption
venom inhalation
excavating for my answer
i sit in silence
burying myself with the sand blowing over everything i've uncovered
indecisiveness
my tranquil escape from myself
going to the sky
only in disdaining my return to sanity
leaping back to my minds outskirts
to get away from me
sailing on my illuminated path
that is eternal
never ending
consuming me
i plot a path into the unknown...